Failure vs Success

As motivators and de-motivators the fears of failure and success are in many ways at opposite ends of the spectrum and yet they lead to the same end. I wonder if writing about the two I will come to some understanding of which it is that delays me and from there find ways out.
I have always been concerned that people see me in s certain way and I am starting to think that this kind of concern has prevented me from taking a big risk in case I made a big mistake and was seen to be not as much as I thought I was. And yet in not trying I find myself as I said before just barely surviving on the edge. So what is really the worst that could happen if I really did make all the phone calls and no one needed my work? Would I be any worse off than now, when I do have a couple of places that use me all the time? Not really, the only thing I would know for sure is that I was marketing to the wrong people or in the wrong way. There are so many manuals and written documents of so many types that are created in virtually every business every day it is not possible that I have kept going on the very small group of clients who use technical writers or who would like to use technical writers. In fact I would be inclined to guess that the demand for us far outstrips the supply. It is a new field in many ways and not a lot of people like to do it. In fact the first graduates in the field are only now getting out of University.
What about the other end of the coin? What do I stand to lose if I actually make it financially. I don't think I would become an instant asshole, admittedly a possibility in the past but I think I have grown. That means I don't have to worry about my integrity. I should not lose any of my friends as they will like me broke or well off. Basically the only thins I lose is the ability to bitch about not getting anywhere in my life. That doesn't seem to be a lot to give up to earn a decent living and have clothes that aren't sort of falling off.
Interestingly enough the mere act of sending off those emails was empowering and getting an immediate response is certainly good reinforcement. Whether that turns into a contract I don't know yet but while I am waiting to find out I should be able to locate a couple of other people to talk to. My goal for the beginning of February is to sign up 5 new companies for some service or other - that may require up to 250 calls. By spring I want to be able to afford to go to Cliff's wedding without worrying financially, join a golf club for around $1300.00 and set up advertising at the tees of at least three decent clubs.
I know that some people think it is a bad idea to plan that far ahead but I am actually a believer in a few things. For example, if you envision things they can happen - aim for the stars you may catch the moon, aim at the moon you may only catch a streetlight. If you write down your goals it is easier to achieve them - writing makes things more concrete in your mind by adding a physical aspect to a wish. And, the completion backwards principle works - figure out where you want to be and then figure out the steps required between here and there.
The interesting thing is that the new year is often a good time to catch people who need to get things done before tax time and before they have to set up the next year's budget. Since sending things out to anyone over the Christmas holiday is a waste of time - most unsolicited stuff from this time should rightfully end up in the trash - I will instead put together some databases. The one I have already for IT companies is pretty good but there is a lot of orignal equipment manufacturing going on in this city and I should be able to find a database of those guys. It will be interesting to see how many of them already have a web presence since creating one may be an additional service I can hit them with once my foot is in the door. Fortunately those things don't really take any of my time and I should even be able to farm out the writing and just oversee it in the way of editing - we shall see.
Off searching for a database.